Decisions, Decisions...
I stand at a crossroads. I am presented with the most critical decision that I will face during this election. Its repercussions will carry a huge personal impact, in both the short term — tonight — and the long term — until mid-afternoon tomorrow.
And that decision is…
What beer do I pick up on the way home to drink while I watch the results come in?
Do I pick up Coors, the original Banquet Beer, in support of Pete Coors’ Colorado Senate race? Or do I register an eponymous endorsement of the President by picking up a twelver of Busch?
Do I select a watery light beer, safe in the knowledge that the unpleasantness will all be over tomorrow? Or do I buy a full-caloried regular beer, risking the possiblity that the extra girth on my gut will hang around until mid-December?
Or do I reject horrible American pee pee beer altogether and go with a more flavorful import? Dare I submit my booze selection to the dreaded global test?
Samuel Adams would seem like a reasonable compromise, but as it’s a product of the Boston Beer Company, I have rejected it out of hand.
Which way will my undecided liver swing in this critical battleground race? I’ll let you know what the exit polls say as soon as I walk out of Ralph’s.